Big Bang Theory

I'm a guy, some of my readers are girls...we're different in many ways...just to clear it up with that certain someone...it's because I don't like you...anyway, back to the post...Many people have their own theories on how the universe was created...but the main theory is that of the Big Bang...for the record, the big bang is NOT what happens at Tara's house everynight. I have my own interpretation of the Big Bang theory...and it involves the legendary Bert's junk. Few have come in conta...actually many have come in contact with it so it's no secret...it's powerful, so powerful that it has enough energy to start the universe...so one day, Bert was hangin out with Tiger Woods, playin a lil golf, and Tiger turned to Bert and said, "Let me hit your balls with my driver." Bert had 3 beers, was feeling the alcohol, and allowed it. He's been in worse situations before, grandmothers raping him, fat girls raping him, himself raping.....himself...Nevertheless, Bert laid down on the ground, with his balls exposed in the air in an upright position. Tiger eyed up his balls, took a swing, and bam...Bert's eyes opened more than when a taco salad is comin his way. A huge explosion followed...and a Milky Way came out of his butt...in an instant the Universe was formed...